A quick turn 'round

Josh came over tonight!!! And in so doing he and my mother duked it out. Well not really, but I like to think that they would have. Actually, what happened was good. They had a rather lengthy discussion--one that turned out to be over three hours long--about their mutual dislike for each other, which turned out to be baseless; about me and my mental status, which is embarrassing but necessary if we are to be close; and about what all of us must do for anything to be successful. I must do well in school this term or else nothing will work out. If I fail this term, it may very well be the end of my schooling. PSU doesn't seem to have put me on academic probation, but the risk of academic expulsion is high at this point. I failed both classes I took last term, and to do that again would put be behind so far both academically and financially that I may not survive it.

So I must put one foot in front of the other now and move forward one step at a time. For now my doctor has added another medication and recommended starting therapy as soon as possible. Also Mom is going to help me get my homework done this weekend, which means less time with Josh, but in the end it will mean more time with him. He was very understanding tonight even with all my issues, so I know he really is a great guy--truly wonderful indeed. So by the end of the weekend I should be caught up with all my homework and ready to face midterms this week to come. Wish me luck in the next few weeks that I may be the best I can be and not worry about what is to come, rather focus on what is now and what I can do to better myself in this moment so that I may prepare for what is to come, which I can only hope to be better than what is now. The good thing about being on the bottom is that you can only hope to get higher from there.